• pixistik13

    I miss my mom. :(

  • kmpinkel

    Before I even read your post I was having a Walter Mitty moment, I have lots of those, wherein I got an award for just being me. I thought would that not be cool if people, on random days, were given awards for just being them. And I open your post and WHOA! You just nailed it! Congratulations. I know your mother is proud. Its not an Avon Award, but pretty damn close. Truly, she taught you everything she knows!

  • Nan

    Beautifully written

  • http://www.pennyforyourshoes.com/ Daisy

    Such a beautiful piece, but damnit, you always make me either cry or laugh out loud at my computer, making all my colleagues wonder what the hell I’m reading. :)

  • Colleen

    This makes me want to call my mom, though I doubt I could ever say these things so eloquently. There would surely be more than one “motherfucker” in my blabbering. Congratulations!

  • http://kristanhoffman.com/ Kristan


    This is so beautiful, Heather. And a wonderful post leading into Mother’s Day weekend.

  • Jenny

    And now I’m a babbling mess of tears. I feel the same way about my mom – this is so beautiful. And that Iris Award? Totally deserved, you’re why a lot of us are chronicling our parenting adventure out loud. Congratulations!

  • Ri


  • Meghan

    There should be a warning on this to not read when pregnant or you will do the ugly cry in your office (sshhh, I’m working) and people will stare. Beautiful.

  • Suebob

    Well, you really dropped the mother’s day mic with that one. Dang, woman.

  • Dana B.

    You are so very lovely, Heather Armstrong.

  • Heather B.

    And now I’m crying again because when you started crying I started crying and then we all started crying and I’m surprised we didn’t need lifeboats to get out of The Buckhead Theater. What a spectacular evening and I, for one, am honored to know you after all of these years. Keep on keeping on, friend.

  • KC

    Congratulations! Happy Mothers Day! Well done Heather Armstrong! Well done!

  • jashshea

    Holy cow. Gorgeous. You’ve been absolutely killing it lately, Heather. Your girls are so very lucky to have to in their corner.

    *Off to call my mom and thank her for making me alive!

  • Holly McCreary

    As a mom of 2 young daughters, and also the daughter of a wonderful mother, this really touched me. Just beautifully written Heather, seriously, I’m feeling all the feels. Congratulations on your motherfucking award!

  • Lorna.Fleener

    Ditto what Daisy said… exactly!

  • Calm Mom Bottles

    Congrats – and thank you for this. You’ve given me something even more to strive for with my son.

  • Lauren3

    Beautiful, Heather. Your words are always one of the best parts of my day. And like I said about your website last week…

    “That is part of the beauty of all literature. You discover that your longings are universal longings, that you’re not lonely and isolated from anyone. You belong.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald

  • Jenny

    Beautifully said, I’m not a mom yet, but I hope to be as thoughtful as you are!

  • Karen

    wow. thanks for sharing these beautiful words and all the words that came before them. and congrats to you.

  • Amy Gomoljak

    I’m so glad I accidentally stumbled across your blog 8 years ago. I have been a loyal daily reader ever since. I always had a soft spot for the letters you would write to Leta. You’ve made me laugh, you’ve made me cry, and you certainly must be doing something right to have so many followers and such a long blogging career. You totally deserved that award. Congrats! (Looks like they could’ve gave you a tiny heads up about the acceptance speech though.)

  • LWE

    Love. Just feeling it, and sending it. Thank you for sharing it. <3

  • Isabel Kallman

    beautiful tribute.

  • malisams

    well shit. hadn’t cried yet today. guess this was as good an excuse to as any. thanks, and happy mother’s day.

  • Michelle

    Congratulations, Heather. Wonderful piece! Great honor.

  • issascrazyworld

    Bawling. That is all. You put into words the way I feel about my girls right now. And my mother. I am sitting her stunned at this. Congratulations on the award. You deserve it. ps. My oldest is twelve and we’ve been very close since she hit about nine and it’s still going strong. I have that closeness and possibly even more with my nine year old as well. I can see how the teen years may change it and I’m prepared for that…I think. However I can also tell that even if our relationship fades some, it will come back. As mine did with my own mother.

  • http://www.sarahaugen.org Sara Haugen

    Darn onions there at the last paragraph.

  • megmcg

    You make me want to try harder

  • http://www.tokenblogger.com ɯoɔ˙ɹǝƃƃolquǝʞoʇ

    You were so blessed to have such a mother. I’m envious.

  • KristenfromMA

    1. Knew it right here: Carrie: A forerunner. A ground breaker. A Vanguard.

    2. Congratulations! :D

    3. BLUB!!!

  • harugirlie

    hahaha totally what ^^said!

  • Shey

    Incredible, poignant, important, meaningful words. This was wonderfully well-written and makes me tear up. It’s exactly the kind of mothering I never had but that I hope to be able to give one day. Thank you for putting into words. Heather, as always, you rock.

  • Carin Sweerman

    This was one of those “I know where this is going!” moments – congrats, Heather; totally deserved!
    And I loved your words about your relationship with Leta and how it’s evolving from fulfilling needs to actually forming a human being and giving her values, lessons and experiences that will help shape her and stay with her forever.
    Beautifully written, piece, Heather – thank you for keep on doing what you’re doing.

  • DriverB

    Totally agree. Mic. DROPPED.

    And thank you. We’re here because you’re awesome. And because you do put it into words so well (butt songs included!).

  • Jen Wilson

    Thanks for making me all teary, Heather. My mom didn’t build into me at all. She was distant. She rarely hugged me. I never talked to her about anything because I didn’t trust her. I never missed her when I went away. She shamed me when I made mistakes. She only brought God into it when I got my first period (“This is what they meant when the Israelite women were unclean!”) and when she found out I lost my virginity (“What would God think?”) When I was pregnant at 17, she said she’d never forgive me if it happened again. (This leads to another long, devastating story that doesn’t belong in the comments.)

    I’ve heard stories from women of our generation who had moms like yours, ones who built into them, who cheered them on, who lifted them up when they fell, who they want to see often because their moms make everything better. I’ve never felt this way. My only hope is that I will be this to my daughters (13 & 7). My eldest talks to me about everything and I listen to everything and it seems so weird to me to have this kind of relationship with her because I didn’t know it existed because I didn’t have it with my mother. I hug her and make sure she knows that I love her no matter what. ALWAYS. NO MATTER WHAT. I love it when daughters like you write these things about their mothers because it gives me hope that I can be this for my daughters. So thank you.

  • Mommiebear2


  • Angela

    Congratuations, Heather! This was such a great post. I still love your site after all these years and I think the posts get better all the time.

  • Desiree Johnson

    Congratulations! PLEASE find a video of your acceptance speech and post it so we can laugh at (I mean with) you! You deserve the award!

  • Dita

    Out of all the blogs I read & have read, only yours has consistently held my interest, and I’m not even a mom (and it’s too late to ever be one). Your honesty and outrage, your high spirits and low, your wonder and bravery are all compelling reasons to keep me coming back. Thank you for bringing your lustre to my life!

  • BabetteFeasts

    BRAVA. Here I was thinking..long post. Instead you just blew me away and have made me wish back my own children’s years so I could start again and be more like you. Oh, and my other friend, Jody M. Her too. Or maybe I just need a fourth child. Yeah, that’s the ticket. I’d get it right with number 4…ah, I digress. This was so wonderful to read. I DO wish my own children could see that in me. I can only hope that someday they will. Ya done good, kiddo.

  • Rita Arens

    Love this.

  • http://www.lifeofjill.com/ jillmansfield

    In some ways, you’ve given many of us a voice we didn’t know we had. Seeing you accept an award because of it was beautiful.

    Your speech was just what it needed to be. Congratulations.

  • amack

    It’s cool. I like to cry at work.

  • RzDrms

    “I hope that she knows that I knew what she was doing.” WAAAHHH!!!

    I hope she read this surprise blogpost from you and called you, opening up with, “You b¡tch. You made me cry so hard that I ruined my perfect makeup.”

    ps congrats, lady.

  • Maggy

    I wish I could say the same for my mother. I didn’t have children because I had no real roll model for mothering

  • Beth Rich

    dammit I was going to the grocery store. Now i gotta wait a bit so I can see to drive.

  • http://www.readjessicarunck.com JessicaNoDak

    And…I’m crying at work.

  • August

    Me too.

  • Kylie

    You just made me cry on the 10:35pm train home.

  • Kelli

    Damn. Tears sitting and waiting for takeout. You amaze me, your words come together in the most powerful form.