the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Probably the worst idea ever

I wish we had a camera rolling when they found this yesterday morning, climbed in, and Marlo hit the gas. It lurched two feet backwards and both of them screamed in jubilant terror. Plastic and pink. Barbie-themed. Barbie IN A BATHING SUIT-themed. What can I say? I live in a flyover state.

This now seems like a really bad idea since Marlo already has a broken arm and we spent Sunday morning at the ER assessing whether or not Leta had broken her foot after slipping on melted snow in the kitchen. Luckily it’s just a bad sprain. Let’s just hope they don’t try to hop any curbs or outrun law enforcement.

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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