• Theresa

    Three cheers for: 1. Going into pregnancy with open eyes about your physical and mental health and the health of your baby; 2. Sticking it to all the morons who have the gall to chastise you for your well-considered decisions; and 3. Being open and frank (as always )about depression and medication, which is still pretty taboo.

    Also, my partner owes you a thank-you note because all the baby-having and cute bump pictures are making this commitment-phobe want to get married (Prop 8 notwithstanding) and have babies like next week.

  • http://www.theindependentmom.com The Independent Mom!

    Seriously, you do what is needed to remain healthy and you listen to your doctors – that is how it should be.

    At lest you’re not this asshat

  • Just the Girl

    I have had two healthy babies while on depression meds. It can be done and believe me the end result is so great!

  • Just me

    I took Prozac during my pregnancy and had a beautiful healthy girl that got a 10 on her apgar.
    I took the Prozac the whole time I breast fed her as well.
    You keep on your Prozac and keep your sanity.
    Enjoy your pregnancy and ice cream!
    Just me

  • Regan

    I wholeheartedly agree with you. I took Prozac throughout my entire pregnancy and certain other anti-depressants well before I even conceived. I felt like, if I’m really stressed and very unhappy all of the time, then how on earth is that going to be good for my baby? And anyway, you shouldn’t even have to explain yourself, but you do. I even took a certain migraine pill when I was pregnant, that the doc said could be harmful if taken in large doses, but for my sake, I could take it when needed. It was awesome because, I had the worst migraines known to man, but after only a few times of taking my meds, I didn’t have them as often, and it was a HUGE relief among other pregnancy annoyances.

    P.S. You look great! This is the first time I have ever commented so I also just want to say congrats!

  • http://www.veerle.us/veerle Veerle

    Congrats on your little new bean. You look great!

  • Alison

    Good for you! I was wondering what you were doing – excepting, hoping that you’d stick with the medicine that works for you.

    My husband and I are trying to get pregnant. I asked my doctor about my antidepressant and she switched me to another one. It just isn’t working to the point where it is impacting my ability to work. I switched back and could feel the difference.

    So today I’m at my desk thinking how much I love my job and how I’m worried that I could lose it if I give up my meds in order to have a baby (seriously, it’s not good without the right stuff). Then I’d have a baby and, perhaps, no job. Yeah, maybe the reason I’m not conceiving is stress – just maybe.

    Do what you need to do for you and your family.

  • dre

    You GO girl! You look beautiful.

    Thanks for sharing, as always. Those said dickwads should understand that this is strictly an issue between you, Jon and your doctors.

    And as for the idiot “love hating dooce” #188 – F*ck off. Really.

  • ritabby

    DOOCE RULES! (You’re bump looks bigger, because you’re thinner.) Thanks for sharing.

  • Michelle

    A post you did on depression over a year ago finally got me to my doctor’s office. After years and years of depression, I am now on Wellbutrin. It doesn’t take it all away, all the time, but it takes the edge off and I don’t have any dark “episodes” now.

    Also, I wanted to tell you that I had terrible postpartum depression with my first baby. It made me scared to have another one…for almost ten years! When I had my second baby, I didn’t get any kind of depression at all. And this was before I went on Wellbutrin. So it’s a possibility.

  • Vicky

    Having read your trials with postpartum depression, I think you should do whatever you need to do to keep sane. Even if that *does* involve ketchup with every meal.

    Congratulations again – I’m so pleased for you all :)

  • http://www.elissaminorrust.blogspot.com Elissa Minor Rust

    Good for you, Heather. I took antidepressants through my third pregnancy to avoid the complete freak out lunacy that followed my first two. And guess what? Not only is she my most beautiful, easy going child, but I actually enjoyed her infancy. My husband looked at me our second day in the hospital after she was born and said, “You haven’t had any crying jags.” And it was true. I didn’t have any, and I felt happy the way I always heard people did when they birthed babies.

    You’re making the right decision for yourself. And a huge congratulations, by the way!

  • Robyn

    You look great, and your last paragraph is a total keeper!

  • http://www.welcometosunnyside.com caroline

    you look effing beautiful! My official congrats to you. I have had two kids with Paxil and they are just fine. well from those drugs at least.

    I am so happy that you are having another. My son is 2 months younger than Leta and I started reading you when our kids were just about 1 1/2. then I had another and my life got thrown in a blender.

    your life is crazy with the dogs and all, but i’ve got all that too. you need more than one kid to catch up to my craziness and keep me laughing and not feeling jealous of the fact that you don’t do diapers anymore. :-)

    good luck! you are awesome.

  • Tabby

    I hope this doesn’t come across as offensive (as I truly am just curious), but with all the medical concerns for potential mothers, why not prioritize adoption?

  • http://www.sayvil.com sayvil

    When I was 7-weeks pregnant with my second kid, I was already showing. It was very frustrating. At least I got to skip the “just looks fat” step that time.

  • Jaclyn

    With the advice of my OB-Gyn, psychiatrist, therapist and fertility doc, I was on Zoloft for both of my pregnancies and I have two healthy, happy daughters (3 years and 8 months)…and my daughters have a healthy, happy mommy!

    Congratulations on the new belly critter! Here’s hoping the puking stops soon.

  • Mickie

    I only WISH I had known how to control my depression after my first child. I would have enjoyed my 2nd pregnancy so much more. I was miserable and sad and dark. I almost died after my 2nd child and I will not allow anyone to judge me for making the decision to take medication to help save me. I live with depression. Deal with it. I am a fantastic Mom and my kids are going to grow up with a woman who has enough sense to know she needs help.

    It sounds like a few of your critics could use a few prozac crammed up their nether regions.

  • http://kattykatty.blogspot.com Kathy

    I have been following your blog for maybe half a year now and I didn’t know that you were previously pregnant and had a miscarriage. My heart sank.

    Glad you’re pregnant now! When I read about the news, I cheered in my livingroom!


  • elisha

    You’ve probably already heard about this, but I wanted to pass this on in case you hadn’t. I’ve read quite a bit about taking Omega 3, both for the baby’s brain development, and also because it’s supposed to help in terms of possibly preventing postpartum depression. I’m almost 13 weeks pregnant myself and have been taking Nordic Naturals Prenatal Omega 3. Good luck with your pregnancy!!

  • http://www.engineerwoman.blogspot.com Amanda

    You go heather. I’M SO EXCITED FOR YOU!!!! (Still). And it STILL requires the use of caps and way too many exclamation points. ;)

    Sometimes I wonder if it’s weird that I care so much about you and your family when we don’t even actually know each other…but I do, and I’m soooooooooooo happy for y’all!

  • Anna


  • http://reamorama.blogspot.com ReamORama

    Yay Dooce! Glad to hear you are rolling with it-

  • Jeanette

    you are fantastic. absolutely fantastic. congrats on the baby, your adorable family, the Web site, your sense of humor… happy holidays!

  • Karen in Mpls

    I scanned many of these comments and I cannot tell you how disappointed I am that Tom Cruise didn’t post a single word. I was so hoping. . .

  • Phyllis

    I have been working in mental health settings for almost 30 years and I look forward to the day when questioning/challenging another person’s psychiatric medication decisions is looked upon in the same way as questioning medication for diabetes or hypertention and glasses for nearsightedness. Most of the comments here have stuck with pretty mainstream treatments for depression, but there are women successfully controlling their health through combinations of mood stabilizers and antidepressants. I appreciate #971 Snooks recommending the Mass.General Women’s Mental Health website. There are no guarantees in pregnancy no matter what we do or don’t do; so each woman can weigh the risks/benefits of her own personal situation.

  • http://jackandjillputupablog.com/ Jack & Jill Put Up A Blog

    Screw ‘em! Hell yeah! You are inspiring. Jack says so too!

    Love the pics. Do you always look this cute? Geez. I work from home too and I have not showered yet because I intend to workout today! It’s like 3:30 here. Ugh. Anywho. Go Dooce-er-mama!

  • SusannahS

    Kudos to you and your family! One of my biggest fears is what I will do when I start a family. I’ve been on Prozac for 14 years and I *need* it if I don’t want to live my live crying while curled in the corner of the closet. Reading this gives me hope for my future.

  • Anonymous

    You look great! And that goodness there is a drug out there that’s safe during pregnancy! PS. you’re second kid, twelve week bump makes my first kid, fifteen week bump look huge! :O

  • http://www.halfasstic.com/ Krissa

    Well said. (Envision pumping fist in the air.)

  • http://frecklefacegirl.blogspot.com/ Freckle Face Girl

    Congrats! Mothers should always do whatever they think is best & ignore everyone else. :)

  • http://www.daddyscratches.com Daddy Scratches

    Um, about comment #2? I meant “cloven-hooved beast,” not “clove-hooved beast.”

    I know: totally lame to make an additional comment just to correct a typo in a previous comment, but I am neurotic enough to where it would drive me nuts to not address it. Humor me.

  • silk


    I don’t have time to read all the comments, and I would be amazed if you did, Heather. So I am probably repeating something someone else may have already told you. BUT. Just in case. I had two VERY different pregnancies, one with mega ultra HORRID gastroinstestinal issues. Two products that are VERY baby safe and made a WORLD of difference: one, simethicone, the brand name, which I think is call Mylanta Gas now. There are several, but that absorbed the best for ME. I bloated up to my THROAT. So much gas that made my stomach SO HARD and large that they thought I was going to have twins. Number two, which is really great, because it is not internal: SEABANDS. These are small bands that encircle your wrists and put pressure on a particular spot that dull the nerve messages to your brain and reduce your ability to feel nausea. I think. It’s been awhile. But they worked AMAZING for me. They are usually used in sea sickeness or chemotherapy patients. The best to you.

  • Kathy

    oh man,I sure hope Tom Cruise doesn’t troll Dooce!
    He would have a field day with this ! ha

    Heather— it is beyond commendable that you are using this time to clear the air on this issue, tastefully and with caution. With all of those that read your site, I am sure that thought has crossed more minds than you care to entertain… but you are a medium and you are using your gift very well!

    Rock on that baby-bump!

  • Tiffany

    I’m a med student, and when I was on my OB rotation, the doctor I worked with put almost all of his pregnant patients on Prozac. He cited some obscure study that said that children born to moms on Prozac performed better than their drug-free gestation peers in kindergarten.

    Oh, and also something about those patients not calling him at 3 am to cry anymore. (Not that I’m saying you shouldn’t call your OB at 3 am to cry. Because, really, if you can’t do that occasionally, what the hell are you paying for?)

  • Anonymous

    Thank you for posting about this issue. For being brave enough to face it head on and say just because I have an illness does not mean I do not deserve everything in life. I am 32 and have suffered from depression since I was 15. I have been hospitalized 6 times all for suicide attempts. This last year I finally turned the corner. During all of this though I went to college, got married, got divorced, worked with children, advocated for the rights of the mentally ill and have been on numerous drugs. I love children. I have given up on having children. The fear is too great for me. But like you said that is MY DECISION. I know I would be a wonderful mother and I have a great support system if I needed help. It is a personal decision not to be taken lightly but to be made by no one other than the family involved. But thank you for showing what a hard issue it is for many of us to face. Sometimes seeing someone else do something you think you can’t do makes you realize you really can do it – you just have to figure out a way…

  • Debbie

    Do whats best for you and your family! You are helping others to understand that sometimes you have to help yourself.

  • Michael

    Congratulations to you and Jon. I hope you get over your morning sickness soon. That’s really gotta suck. If your doctor feels it’s safe for you to stay on your meds then screw the dickwads I say. Love your blog.

  • jessica

    I suffer from depression myself. Before I was pregnant I was on effexor, neurotin and wellbutrin. Lots of meds I know. I had to go off all of them during my pregnancy. My pregnancy was hell and I had to go back on my medication ASAP after I gave birth. Because of this, I was unable to breastfeed.

    I commend you for wanting to stay on top of your mental health. Keeping your mental health in check; is the only way that you are going to be able to be 100% in toon with your baby. I am also glad that Prozac works for you. It didn’t do a damn thing for me. LOL.

  • http://snailbird.com Nikki

    You’ve got crazy, hard-core guts. And I admire you and applaud your decision. When you give birth to a healthy baby with the correct number of hands, toes, feet, and fingers, then you can shove that cute infant face in theirs and say, “Told you so!”

  • Jessica :o)


    I’m so happy for you. Not just for the baby, but especially for so openly inviting negativity as being strong enough to brush it off!

    I love your blog!


  • http://www.mysailorsmistress.net Jennifer nguyen

    kudos to you!!! Do what you need to do to be a happy mama!!!!

  • Tanya

    What a gorgeous photo of you! I can’t believe a human is growing in that tiny little bump, it is amazing.

    Stop getting all defensive, by the way. We adore you here.
    Instead, how about one of those fantabulous exclamation point! exclamation point! exclamation point! posts. I love those.

  • http://www.holycrapiampregnant.blogspot.com/ Sonya

    You are smart. You asked a medical professional you trust and that’s the best thing to do! Any assholes who tell you you’re doing something wrong are most likely NOT medical professionals. I’m pregnant too and I trust my doctors to give me the best advice and trust that they have much more experience with this than I do! Good luck and I can’t wait to see more bump photos. I am 8.5 months pregnant and I sort of wish I had taken bump photos, but I started out chubby, so I would feel like I was just taking pictures of growing chub. Now that I am getting closer, I feel much better about my belly and have taken more photos!

  • Tiffany

    And…I effing LOVE this masthead.

  • http://www.justinrazmus.com Justin Razmus

    My wife and I are at about 4 months (pregnant, her, not me!). Your site is great, and I can feel your excitement. This is our second, and we look forward to it. I hope all goes well for you now, and during the raising of your child!

  • http://mise-en-space.blogspot.com Leigh

    I’m sure you’ve heard this a million times but once more for good measure — Prozac has been around so long and studied so extensively that most doctors agree that, even though there are no *formal* studies, it is safe for the baby.

    Or safer than letting the woman carrying said baby go down the spiral into utter despair.

    My two cents, worth probably less, but still. :)

  • http://goaliej54.blogspot.com Jessica

    I think I see the bump! :) I know, it’s different when it’s your own body. I’ve been told that I’m “not that big,” but I feel like I’m carrying around a Butterball in my stomach. Also, from what I’ve heard, there are many safe anti-depressants to take during pregnancy, and it’s better for the baby for the mother to be in good spirits and coping well than to make the mom stop taking the meds. I almost had to go on one due to panic attacks early in my pregnancy, but luckily, I was able to start coping (not sure if it was the change in hormones or the therapy, but something worked). I’m glad to hear you’re feeling well. Well, besides the morning sickness. :)

  • Melissa K.


    I appreciate you posting this information on your meds your continuing struggle. I too take prozac for depression. My doctor has had to remind me not to stop taking it since I used to feel guilty about the stigma. Your website makes me feel normal and now I know, if I ever get lucky and blessed enough to get pregnant, I don’t have to sacrafice my sanity to bring a new life into this world. Thank you! Bless you and your family!

  • Heather

    I hope you actually read this message. i wrote to you when our kids were just a few months old (when i started reading your blog) my name is heather, my husband’s name is jon, no h. i used to be a web designer/developer. my son is 3 months older than your daughter. i lost my job due to a misdirected email much like your blog. anyway, i am writing again almost 5 years and 1 more child later. where you will soon be. tomorrow is my daugher’s 1 year well-child appointment and i will FINALLY be mentioning my untreated post-partum depression. i HATE myself and my life and i avoided antidpressants due to fear of birth defects. the risk of birth defects is the least of my children’s problems. i am a horrible mother. i suck at this and need that pharmacological help! i am miserable every day and i am ruining my children because of it. YOU ARE DOING THE RIGHT THING TAKING THOSE MEDS. it will be a miracle if my kids reach adulthood in a totally unfucked way. i am you without meds and it isn’t pretty.