An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

Baby bird

Last night as I was changing Marlo into her pajamas I found a half-chewed piece of graham cracker, a swath of dried applesauce and two Cheerios tucked right inside the lip of her diaper. And no, I certainly did not experience an inexplicable urge to shove the crumbs into my mouth to avoid having to walk across the room to the trash can. Not one bit.

I’m glad no one else was in the room.

Marlo is a ravenous eater and has yet to refuse anything we’ve offered her. I’m not taking this as a sign of anything, though, because Leta was exactly the same way until she staged a hunger strike at eighteen months. She doesn’t like us to bring up the fact that she used to eat anything, what she probably remembers as The Dark Years, and now when we ask her to try new things she says sure. When she’s seven. But not until then. Have I mentioned that she writes our legal documents?

Anyway, Marlo crawls around with her mouth open. If she she sees you eating something from across the room she will motor over, up and around obstacles, and climb up your body to get at whatever it is. Once I was slicing a lemon to put in a glass of water, and she sat on the floor and tugged at my leg, her head slung backward, mouth wide open. And I was all, okay then. You asked for it, kid! And then I cackled wildly as I handed her a juicy rind.

And now she has a new favorite treat:

  • kayakgrrl

    My daughter does that. (Ewww!)

  • camillaro

    Ah, that face! Adorable!

  • SMK1126

    Oh my God Heather, that is so cute!

  • CO

    My daughter does it too! She loves lemons and always demands them if they are in my water glass. It’s very strange!

  • reymiland

    That face she makes is just adorable. At least she will have her vitamin c for the day!

  • mollyawesome

    Oh my goodness, her laughing expression is making me make the exact same face, so so so cute. Can I hold her?!

  • Miss Lola

    She is beyond adorable! Heads up, I know you probably know this, but those lemons are terribly acidic and sucking on lemons is a recipe for disaster for her teeth…I work in a dental office…you do not want your beautiful baby getting decay…lemons are great, just don’t chew or suck on them!

  • Lucy_Luck

    It is so lovely to see (and hear!) you talking and her reacting to you – it is just the cutest thing! (Sorry to sound cliche, but dammit, it is cute!).

  • Mrs Jenna

    I’ve watched this video 4 times. She is so stinkin cute.

  • Christabellyo

    That SO made my morning. She is so adorable.

  • TexasKatie

    OMG, she is so freaking adorable!

    And I love her strawberry birthmark on her forehead – I had one, too, as a baby. To this day, when I cry, you can see it.

    My stepson LOVED lemons as a baby. He used to get that same sly little look on his face when he’d eat one!

  • Serenity Bohon

    Ah, the human vacuum years. Shortly followed by the Where-Did-You-Get-That-Gum?! years and eventually, Yes-Good-Grief-You-Can-Have-The-Rest-Of-My-Fries!

  • kaethend

    My seven week old makes that same face and smile and scrunchy thing that they do and it just kills me every time.

    There’s nothing better.

  • Woon

    Adorable! The lemon teeth enamel thing is true. 🙁 I love how her shoulders go up with her giggle.

  • kristanhoffman

    Haha, my cousin’s baby girl did the same thing (demanded a lemon slice) at a restaurant, so we let her have it, and OH MAN did she make the best face ever! She clearly hated it, but she wouldn’t let us take it away. She was probably twice as old as Marlo is in this video, though.

    Kids are such stinkers, haha.

  • Cornelia

    That is the cutest thing I have ever seen!!! Her expression is the best.

  • selizara

    I’m told I did that all the time as a kid – demanded the lemons. (And, I’m not going to lie…I still love eating them straight.)

  • fidothefatcat

    I don’t know if Marlo could be any cuter. Thank you for posting the video.

  • dtelisman

    My son is 2, and he wants to try everything, but then he won’t actually eat it. He begs like dog. He’s just a tease.

  • duffylou

    When she hugs her little self and giggles, well I’m just putty.

  • terrible_t


    My son is 9, and still loves to do this… but now that he’s 54″ (!) it’s getting really hard to remember him that small ^_^

  • tokenblogger

    I think that one might go viral if you put it on youtube. Seriously.

    What happens when you give her a pickle or some vidalia onion?

    Made me smile — and I’ll be showing this to the DH — he’s a lemon lover, too.

  • Lisa Golightly

    killing me with the cuteness!

  • ninesandquines

    oh she SO knows she’s got it going on 🙂

  • AlyCat

    Oh my gosh, that face she makes is the cutest thing I have EVER seen.

  • acm

    my kid is crazy for lemons. howevever, we never dare let her hold them while she’s eating them, or she’d eat the whole thing, including the rind!! eep.

    (oh, and the little hello shrug at the end nearly slayed me!)

  • Angeerah

    On Saturday my little guy did that with a lime. He would put it in his mouth, make a face, and then put it in again. He loved it! And no, that lime had not been in a Corona.

  • snicho2

    Marlo is so adorable! I love how she says hi at the end of the video.

  • verbalicon



    What a delicious little girl. Now I know what I’m going to do with the hubs this evening, hehe.

  • Tam4797

    A.D.O.R.A.B.L.E. Sorry for the overuse of punctuation, but hey it’s not exclamation marks!!!!!!!!


  • Ena Murphy

    that’s the cutest video ever!

  • lorenawebber

    Too cute! Love your blog!

  • amandalk

    It might not go away…my 4yo is just as picky as Leta, but my 20 month old will still eat anything he is given. (Like, the cheerio that was god only know how old he found under the couch yesterday–he was SO excited.) Don’t judge.

  • PunkinP

    Oh my God, my head just splorted from all the cuteness. That is probably the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.

  • Daddy Scratches

    I am told that when I was able to crawl, I would harvest lint from the carpet and shove it in my mouth. So at least Marlo has the good sense to stick with stuff that’s actually, you know, edible.

  • tracy

    Haha! I totally did that, too, even said the same thing: you asked for it? Well here you go!

  • Kris Mulkey

    Marlo is so cute. I love looking at that happy little face. She reminds me of my daughter. She’s ALWAYS eating, and always happy – – except when she’s doing her math homework.

  • hammy

    She’s just precious.

    All 3 of mine have loved lemons as babies/toddlers. Weird.

  • Lynn0308

    Well, that might just be the cutest thing ever…I love the face!!!

  • EliBailey

    My daughter was the same way when she was little; she ate everything, including lemons. I love the video – that is some super amazing cuteness there!

  • aslapintheface

    I have a kid who has always loved sour stuff too. Give her a couple of spoons of dill relish on her highchair tray and watch her go nuts ! Plus it’s good “spoon practice”.

  • Hazel

    so cute, but I’m afraid your child has no taste buds.

  • buffangel2000

    What a happy baby. She must bring you so much joy with that coy smile of hers.

  • mommica

    I can’t watch the video at work (son of a…!) but I think I know what is occurring therein. My daughter demands lemons, too. Once, I handed over a slice, turned to watch something on tv, and when I turned back around it was gone. RIND AND ALL!

  • expat

    That face she makes at the end is just too cute! I used to eat lemons like that. I would always win the contests who can eat a lemon without making a face.

  • tallnoe

    OMG the cuteness. I love it.

  • Tirzah

    She is so freaking cute!!!! I love her expression!

  • Chum

    I love the shoulder thing she does when she giggles. She’s gorgeous.

  • strawick

    this happened to me too. be prepared for a person that loves all lemon food, all citrus-y food, anything with “tang” (that kind and that kind). i’m 30 and still suck on lemons like a monkey. they’re DELICIOUS!

  • rabidcaribou

    Your kids are freaking adorable. Pretty sure if I handed mine a lemon she’d beat me with it. She’s like that when it comes to trying foods she doesn’t like. It doesn’t end pretty.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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