the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Important reminder

Our vet has pictures of the dogs on file and whenever they are due for a vaccination or an all around checkup they send me a reminder via a postcard of the dog’s face:

Hi Heather,

It’s me! I just wanted to remind you that I’m going to need important health services soon! Call to schedule my appointment!

Remember, regular medical care keeps me happy and healthy so call today!


I’m sorry, but Coco would never send a letter written that way. Hers would say:



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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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